Home  >> Stories  >> The Tale Spinner #2016-07

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IN THIS ISSUE

• Carol Dilworth has an unforgettable adventure in Mexico
• Mike Yeager finds it very hot in Singapore
• Betty Audet forwards some facts about life
• Don Henderson tells about a Mounty´s good deed
• This Microsoft quiz was probably written by a user
• Shirley Conlon has a suggestion for long-term care
• Irene Harvalias sends some of the creations of lexophiles
• Sites are suggested by Don Henderson, Rafiki, Tom Telfer, and Tom Williamson

Carol Dilworth writes about an experience in Mexico:

A TALE OF A WHALE

In January, I made my first trip to Mexico. I have friends who drive there each year and are away from Canada for six months. I have resisted going to Mexico because of the seemingly unwinnable war on drugs, but knowing someone at my destination was a strong draw. And they are both gourmet cooks….

I flew to Houston and changed for Hualtuco. From there, it was a one-hour drive to Zipolite, specifically Playa del Amor, the beach of love. The sunsets at Zipolite are gorgeous and I was especially looking forward to them. Hard luck, the twelve days I visited were among the weakest sunsets my friends have ever seen, and it became quite a joke between us. However, this was more than compensated for by the first-ever beaching of a whale on Playa del Amor. I was there with my camera and my memory. Here is what happened.

On Tuesday, January 19, afternoon, at our daily sunset(?) gathering, there was something bobbing in the distance. I moved to the water´s edge to photograph it, and could see white at one end and what looked like a fin sticking up. The four other Canadians in that day´s group decided that it was a sea turtle, shark, or dolphin. The young Mexicans at the water nailed it: a whale, a first for this beach. The waves started to carry it away and we headed back to our cabanas.

But an hour later there was a yell that the whale had beached. I grabbed my camera and hurried back. There was a line of about thirty-five young people pulling on a rope tied to the tail and having no luck pulling it out of the water. Two more lines were added, around two fins. One hundred people were pulling, but the tide was going out, undoing any progress. I was trying to get a photo in the dark when suddenly a young lady (who turned out to be one of the Oaxaca volunteer whale monitors) handed me a large flashlight, said nothing, and hurried away. I´d been promoted to volunteer light director and I was thrilled!

So I aimed the beam at the whale´s head, illuminating the front rope connection. The whale was gorgeous: blue and white, the eyes open, with massive fins. There was a protruding flesh-coloured sac that expanded and contracted. The young lady returned, pulled on a pair of rubber gloves, and headed back to work. I was still happily engrossed in this when she took the flashlight back, maybe an hour later. She was so thankful that I´d taken over her job! I can say, "It´s nothing" in Spanish, but couldn´t convey how amazing it had been for me.

Pulling continued and I left. About 11:30 p.m., I went part way back along a now quiet beach and could see the whale, tethered and with several lights directed on it for the night.

Next morning the Marines arrived (fully armed) and set up a restricted area with "Precaucion" yellow tape. The whale looked quite different. Its colour was faded and its eyes were closed. The sac was much larger, dark and not moving. It was coming out of the whale´s mouth. Apparently when the tongue stops working, the whale fills with gas, and this was the accumulation that wasn´t leaking out. The Oaxaca volunteers told me that it was a three-year-old male Humpback. (These weigh approximately one ton at birth.) They think it died from a disease because there were no marks anywhere on the body; it hadn´t been attacked and it hadn´t run into anything.

The whale could not be tampered with unless there was government documentation and/or university supervision. Neither arrived, so the body had to be returned to the ocean; no pieces could be harvested. Two boatloads of fishermen volunteered to do this, and the rest of the volunteers were primarily lifeguards from this and the nearby beaches. Several swam out to the fishing boats to attach heavy ropes to the tether ropes. On shore, people dug around the whale and inserted wooden beams under the body to dislodge it from the sand. With the heavier ropes, the lifeguards were able to flip the body over. The sac broke and the remaining gas was released.

People fled from the odour. By this time, so much gas and liquid had drained out that the body was quite flat. One or two more flips and the whale was on his way home. We all clapped and yelled, "Bravo!" Only the young Oaxaca volunteers lingered, understandably reluctant to end their intense involvement just yet.

For me, this was a tremendously satisfying experience; so much better than learning by TV shows or online. I was delighted to see all the young children the first night, and then the school groups the next day. This event will be a life-changer for some. I was lucky to share it.

Mike Yeager writes in his latest blog,

DID I MENTION THAT IT´S HOT IN SINGAPORE?

It´s hot here in Singapore, all the time. And we are told that this is the cooler time of the year. Today´s high is 88 degrees, which sounds bad enough, but the humidity is 84%, and that makes it feel bloody hot. When you go outside and move around a little, you sweat.

Katie and I try to get out and go somewhere every day. We live about a mile from the MRT station and we´re sticky hot and dripping by the time we walk over there. The MRT is air conditioned; in fact, most public and private places are. When we´re all jammed in you´d think it would smell like a gym locker, but it doesn´t. We´re told we will get used to the heat, but after being here three weeks, we still seem to be in the "put on a brave face and tolerate the heat" mode.

This is the second most densely populated sovereign country in the world. There are 5.5 million people living here, and when Katie and I are out amongst them, we seem to be the only ones bothered by the heat, and many of the women are wearing head scarves. The land area is 239 square miles and growing. The government is in a constant state of land reclamation, creating land where there used to be water. The smallest and one of America´s densest states, Delaware, is 1,212 square miles, with a population of 1 million 50 thousand people. I don´t suppose Delaware people smell too bad either, but I´m just guessing.

Modern Singapore was founded in 1819 when Sir Stamford Raffles established a trading post here for the East Indian Company. In 1942, the Japanese defeated the British and took over the island until the end of the war in 1945, and Singapore went back to being under British rule. In 1963, Singapore merged with Malaysia, but broke away and gained independence in 1965. Eighty percent of the people here are Chinese, 13% are Malays, 9% are East Indians. The dominant Caucasian presence here is from Australia. People are friendly, and if I start talking to someone on the street, they usually ask me if I´m from Australia. America´s presence here seems minimal, but McDonald´s, Burger King, Kentucky Fried Chicken, and Starbucks are quite popular, and there are quite a few American brand stores in the malls.

One would be hard pressed to get a good bagel here. In fact, I haven´t even found a bad bagel. I had to go to a pharmacy to find Splenda. Singaporeans like sugary drinks. I´m quite fond of their iced coffees. In Singlish, coffee is called "kopi." It´s made with sweetened condensed milk and it´s delicious. My favorite kopi place is Toast Box. There´s one at the mall near us, and when I´m sipping on an iced kopi in their air conditioning, I can almost forget about the oppressive heat outside.

ED. NOTE: To see more of Mike´s photos of Singapore, click on

http://www.aretiredboomer.blogspot.ca

Betty Audet forwards these

IMPORTANT FACTS TO REMEMBER AS WE GROW OLDER

Death is the number one killer in the world.

Life is sexually transmitted.

Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Men have two motivations: hunger and hanky panky, and they can´t tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.

Give a person a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and he won´t bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.

All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

In the ´60s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.

Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today may be a burning issue tomorrow.

Don Henderson writes: People complain about the RCMP, but you rarely hear about the positive things that they do, such as this one:

FROZEN CARBURETOR INCIDENT

In the fun world of the administration of justice, not all the laughs are in the courtroom. Indeed, giggles and guffaws can erupt at almost any time or place. For example, on a bitterly cold winter´s day in northern British Columbia, an RCMP constable on patrol came across a motorcyclist, who was completely swathed in protective clothing and helmet, stalled by the roadside.

"What´s the matter?" asked the policeman.

"Carburetor´s frozen," was the terse reply.

"Piss on it. That´ll thaw it out."

"I can´t," said the biker.

"OK, watch me closely and I´ll show you." The constable promptly warmed the carburetor as promised. The bike started and the rider drove off, waving.

A few days later, the detachment office received a note of thanks from the father of the motorbike rider. It began: "On behalf of my daughter Joanne...."

The following was obviously written by a Microsoft owner:

COMPUTER QUIZ

Q: What if Bill Gates had a dime for every time Windows Vista crashed?

A: Oh, wait a minute. He already does.

Q. What´s the difference between a virus and windows?

A: Viruses rarely fail.

Q: What do you call Windows multitasking?

A: Screwing up several things at once.

Q: What do houses and Microsoft Windows have in common?

A: Bugs come in through open Windows.

Q: How many Microsoft vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Eight. One to work the bulb, and seven to make sure that Microsoft gets $2 for every light bulb ever changed anywhere in the world.

Shirley Conlon shares this suggestion:

MEDICARE - PART G NURSING HOME PLAN

A zero premium, no deductible long-term health care plan

Say you are an older senior citizen who can no longer take care of yourself and you need long-term care, but the government says there is no nursing home care available for you. So what do you do? You opt for Medicare Part G.

The plan gives anyone 75 or older a gun (Part G) and one bullet. You are allowed to shoot one worthless politician.

This means you will be sent to prison for the rest of your life, where you will receive three meals a day, a roof over your head, central heating and air conditioning, cable TV, a library, and all the health care you need. Need new teeth? No problem. Need glasses? That´s great. Need a hearing aid, new hip, knees, kidney, lungs, sex change, or heart? They are all covered!

As an added bonus, your kids can come and visit you at least as often as they do now.

And who will be paying for all of this? The same government that just told you they can´t afford to put you in a nursing home. And you will get rid of a useless politician while you are at it. And now, because you are a prisoner, you don´t have to pay any more income taxes!

Is this a great country, or what?

Now that you have solved your senior long-term care problem, enjoy the rest of your week!

Irene Harvalias forwards these examples of the creations of

LEXOPHILES

"Lexophile" is a word used to describe those who love using words in rather unique ways, such as "You can tune a piano, but you can´t tuna fish," or "To write with a broken pencil is pointless." A competition to see who can come up with the best ones is held every year.

When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.

A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.

The batteries were given out free of charge.

A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.

A will is a dead giveaway.

With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

A boiled egg is hard to beat.

When you´ve seen one shopping centre, you´ve seen a mall.

Police were called to a day care centre where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? He´s all right now.

A bicycle can´t stand alone; it is two tired.

When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine is now fully recovered.

He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

When she saw her first strands of grey hair, she thought she´d dye.

Acupuncture is a jab well done. That´s the point of it.

And the cream of the wretched crop: Those who get too big for their pants will be exposed in the end.

SUGGESTED SITES

Don Henderson sends this link to a video of the largest glacier calving ever filmed:

Don also recommends this site for a song from the AARP which is appropriate for many of us in an older age bracket:

Rafiki forwards the URL for a video from Norway in which you will see a driver backing up his car and trailer at high speed - through parking lots, roundabouts, and intersections:

Tom Telfer suggests this site to watch Rocky, a French bulldog pup, take his first big leap off the couch. Then watch how easy it is the second time around!:

Tom Williamson forwards this link to a video that warns smart phone owners about flashlight apps because of their vulnerability to hackers and scammers:

This fascinating video about future trains will blow your mind:

An older cat welcomes a kitten to his household:

From the Good News network, here is a story of Mexican university students creating a repellent to avert the Zika virus which is carried by mosquitoes:

This story is about a dog boarding in a kennel in Alberta that sneaked out of her kennel to comfort some foster puppies thata were restless in their new surroundings:

To check out the features of the "freedictionary", which changes daily, go to