Home  >> Stories  >> The Tale Spinner #2016-12

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IN THIS ISSUE

• Mike Yeager is finding the changes in temperature difficult
• Irene Harvalias suggests a pickup line for a senior
• Carol Hansen sends a list of things invented by women
• Catherine Nesbitt forwards examples of English around the world
• Tom Williamson shares his opinion of the best doctors
• Barbara Wear writes about her travel plans
• Sites are suggested by Barbara Wear, Bruce Galway, Catherine Nesbitt, Don Henderson, Tom Telfer, and Tom Williamson

Mike Yeager resumes his account of their visit to Singapore:

FREEZING AT THE MOVIES

We look for air-conditioned activities to do here in Singapore. The heat and humidity are constant, and even a little bit of physical exertion precipitates our sweating like a couple of race horses. Everywhere on the island there are huge mall complexes, and you can go to multiple malls by walking over or under streets, never leaving the air-con. The malls are always bustling with people. With nearly six million people on this small island, almost everywhere is bustling with people.

At this stage of my life, shopping is not a high priority, and malls in general contain very little merchandise that I am interested in. I have enough clothes, I dont need any more gadgets to confuse me, and I am not interested in lugging home a bunch of souvenirs that will end up collecting dust on a shelf.

Even Katie, who likes shopping, isnt that interested in most of these stores. But she does enjoy wandering around the shops more than I do. While she wanders, I plunk myself down in a coffee shop and read or write. I do some of my best writing in noisy coffee shops surrounded by strangers.

We both enjoy going out to the movies, and many of the malls have modern cineplexes. During the day, mid-week, the theaters are not crowded, and with our senior discount, a movie costs only S$4 each. A Sing is worth 72 cents, so in US currency each ticket is $2.88.

Like most public places here, the movie theaters are clean, comfortable, and well managed. Unlike U.S. theaters, you select your seat from a chart when you buy your ticket. Its like buying an airline ticket - you can see what seats are available and then lock them in. Then you wait in another line for food and drinks. The popcorn here is fantastic. You can chose "combination popcorn," which is a mixture of regular popcorn and caramel corn. And they will even adjust the mixture to suit your taste, more salty, less sweet, or the other way around.

Katie and I left the house early the other morning. The MRT station is about a fifteen-minute walk away. Even at 8:30 a.m., we had worked up a good sweat by the time we got there. We rode the air-conditioned train to Holland Village, where a lot of shops cater to westerners. Our destination was the Vietnamese Embassy, a thirty-minute walk from there. We needed to pick up our visas for our upcoming trip to Vietnam. By the time we got back to Holland Village, we were dripping.

We then took the MRT to the Singapore Botanic Gardens, which is a beautiful expansive park filled with all variety of tropical plants.

Our favorite area was the "Orchid Garden." It must be orchid season, because they all seemed to be in bloom. I didnt realize how many types of orchids there are. We wandered around for a couple hours in the gardens. Having lived in Arizona, we made sure to keep ourselves hydrated, and continued on in the heat. Our theory is that at some point were going to become acclimated to this weather.

We decided to take the bus downtown, have lunch, and go to a movie. The bus, of course, was air conditioned and we cooled off. We then walked in the heat to an air-conditioned restaurant, and then thankfully were able to stay in the air-con tunnels and walkways all the way to the movie theater.

Im not sure what effect this hot/cold cycle of existence has on the body, but by the time we were settled into our seats at the theater, we had gone through it six or seven times.

Initially the cool theater felt refreshing. As we sat in the dark, happily munching on our combination popcorn and enjoying the movie, we both began to feel cold. Not just a little cold, but the bone-chilling type of cold. I pulled my arms into my tee-shirt and hugged my body like a little kid who went out in the winter and forgot his jacket. I was shivering. After a while, I felt Katie trying to stick her arms in my shirt too, which didnt work at all.

The movie was "Spotlight," which just won the academy award for best picture, and I highly recommend it. I remember thinking that if it hadnt been such a good movie, or it had been a movie about exploring the Arctic, we definitely would have bailed.

On the walk home from the MRT station, we again began to sweat profusely. Freezing in the movie theater had become a distant memory. The strange thing is, most of the locals here dont seem to be affected by these extremes. Are we the only ones? But we will keep pushing ourselves in the heat, striving after the illusive theory of acclimation.

Peter, my stepson, warned us about the ice-cold movie theaters, but when we leave the house and enter the almost 90 degree and 90% humidity, who thinks about taking along a sweater. Hopefully, we will next time we go to the movies.

ED. NOTE: To view Mike´s photos of this instalment, click on

Irene Harvalias forwards this

SENIOR PICK-UP LINE

An elderly widower walks into an upscale cocktail lounge.

He is in his mid-eighties, very well dressed, hair well groomed, with a great-looking suit, a flower in his lapel, and smelling slightly of an expensive aftershave. He presents a very nice image.

Seated at the bar is a classy-looking lady in her mid-seventies.

The sharp old gentleman walks over and sits alongside her. He orders a drink and takes a sip. He slowly turns to the lady and says,

"So, tell me ... do I come here often?"

Carol Hansen forwards this article on

INVENTIONS MADE BY WOMEN

1. The Car Heater - We all owe our thanks to Margaret A. Wilcox, who invented the car heater in 1893! (Margaret also invented a combined clothes and dishwasher.)

2.Monopoly - This popular board game was designed by Elizabeth Magie in 1904, originally called the Landlords Game. The purpose of this game was to expose the injustices of unchecked capitalism.Her game was ripped off by Charles Darrow, who sold it to Parker Brothers 30 years later.However, Parker Brothers later paid Elizabeth $500 for her game. Gee, thanks!

3. The Fire Escape -The fire escape was invented by Anna Connelly in 1887.

4. The Life Raft -The life-saving Life Raft was invented by Maria Beasely in 1882. (Maria also invented a machine that makes barrels.)

5. Residential Solar Heating -Solar heating for residential housing was invented by Dr. Maria Telkes in 1947.Dr. Telkes was a psychiatrist in addition to being asolar-power pioneer.

6. The Medical Syringe - The medical syringe which could be operated with only one hand was invented by a woman by the name of Letitia Geer in 1899.

7. The Modern Electric Refrigerator -The electric refrigerator was invented by Florence Parpart in 1914. (Florence also invented an improved street-cleaning machine in addition to the refrigerator.)

8. The Ice Cream Maker -The ice cream maker was invented by a woman named Nancy Johnson in 1843. Her patented design is still used today!

9. The Computer Algorithm -Ada Lovelace was essentially the first computer programmer due to her work with Charles Babbage at the University of London in 1842. In fact, her notes were an essential key to helping Alan Turings work on the first modern computers in the 1940s.

10. Telecommunications Technology - Some of the Telecommunication Technology developed by Dr. Shirley Jackson include portable fax, touch-tone telephone, solar cells, fibre optic cables, and the technology behind caller ID and call waiting.

11. The Dishwasher - The dishwasher was invented by Josephine Cochrane in 1887. Before her time, she even marketed her machine to hotel owners, and opened her own factory without the help of a man!

12. Wireless Transmission Technology - Hedy Lamarr, a world-famous film star, invented a secret communications system during World War II for radio-controlling torpedoes. This technology also paved the wayfor everything from Wi-Fi to GPS.

13. Closed-Circuit Television Security (CCTV) - Marie Van Brittan Brown invented CCTV because of the slow response of police officers in 1969 to help people ensure their own security. This invention influenced modern CCTV systems used for home security and police work today.

14. The Modern Paper Bag - Margaret Knight invented a machine that makes square-bottomed paper bags in 1871. She almost didnt get credit when Charles Anan tried to steal her work, claiming that it wasnt possible for a woman to create this brilliant invention.(Margaret also invented a safety device for cotton mills when she was 12. That invention is still being used today.)

15.Central Heating - Although Alice Parkers invention in 1919 of a gas-powered central heater was never manufactured, her idea was the first that allowed for using natural gas to heat a home, inspiring the central heating systems used today.

16.Kevlar - This life-saving material that is five times stronger than steel and used to make bulletproof vests was invented in 1965 by Stephanie Kwolek.

17. Computer Software - Dr. Grace Murray Hopper was a computer scientist who invented COBOL, which is the first user-friendly business computer software system, in the 1940s.She was also a rear admiral in the U.S. navy, and the first person to use the term "bug" in reference to a glitch in a computer system when she literally found a bug (moth) causing problems with her computer.

Catherine Nesbitt shares these examples of

WONDERFUL ENGLISH FROM AROUND THE WORLD

In a Bangkok Temple: It is forbidden to enter a woman, even a foreigner, if dressed as a man.

Cocktail Lounge, Norway: Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.

Doctor´s Office, Rome: Specialists in women and other diseases.

Dry Cleaners, Bangkok: Drop your trousers here for the best results.

A Nairobi Restaurant: Customers, who find our waitresses rude, ought to see the manager.

On the main road to Mombasa, leaving Nairobi: Take notice: When the sign is under water, this road is impassable.

On a poster: Are you an adult that cannot read? If so, we can help.

In a City Restaurant: Open seven days a week and weekends.

In a Cemetery: Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from any but their own graves.

Tokyo Hotel´s Rules and Regulations: Guests are requested not to smoke, or do other disgusting behaviors, in bed.

On the Menu of a Swiss Restaurant: Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.

In a Tokyo Bar: Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.

Hotel, Yugoslavia: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.

Hotel, Japan: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.

In the Lobby of a Moscow Hotel, across from a Russian Orthodox Monastery: You are welcome to visit the cemetery, where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily, except Thursday.

A sign posted in Germany´s Black Forest: It is strictly forbidden on our Black Forest camping site, that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent, unless they are married with each other for this purpose.

Hotel, Zurich: Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.

Advertisement for Donkey Rides, Thailand: Would you like to ride on your own ass?

Airline Ticket Office, Copenhagen: We take your bags and send them in all directions.

A Laundry in Rome: Ladies, leave your clothes here and then spend the afternoon having a good time.

And finally, the all-time classic, seen in an Abu Dhabi Souk shop window: If the front is closed, please enter through my backside.

Tom Williamson sends his opinion of the

SIX BEST DOCTORS IN THE WORLD

1. Sunlight

2. Rest

3. Exercise

4. Diet

5. Self Confidence

6. Friends

Maintain them in all stages and enjoy a long healthy life.

Barbara Wear writes about

My TRAVEL PLANS

I have been in many places, but I´ve never been in Kahoots. Apparently, you can´t go alone. You have to be in Kahoots with someone.

I´ve also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there.

I have, however, been in Sane. They don´t have an airport; you have to be driven there.I have made several trips there, thanks to my children, friends, family, and work.

I would like to go to Conclusions, but you have to jump, and I´m not too much on physical activity any more.

I have also been in Doubt. That is a sad place to go, and I try not to visit there too often.

I´ve been in Flexible, but only when it was very important to stand firm.

Sometimes I´m in Capable, and I go there more often as I´m getting older.

One of my favorite places to be is in Suspense! It really gets the adrenalin flowing and pumps up the old heart! At my age I need all the stimuli I can get!

I may have been in Continent, but I don´t remember what country I was in. It´s an age thing. They tell me it is very wet and damp there.

So you can see I´ve been around the world and have done my share of travels.

You can do your bit by remembering to send this e-mail to at least one unstable person. My job is done! Life is too short for negative drama and petty things. So laugh insanely, love truly, and forgive quickly!

SUGGESTED WEBSITES

Barbara Wear sends this link to a video of an awesome dance, the Thousand-Hand Guan Yin. The tight coordination is amazing, because the 63 dancers are deaf-mutes, relying on signals from trainers at the four corners of the stage:

Bruce Galway forwards the URL for a video of an osprey fishing, in which it catches five or six fish at a time, then catches a flounder under three feet of water, and then flies off with a large steelhead:

Catherine Nesbitt suggests this site for a video of a man creating startling 3-d paintings:

Catherine also sends this link to a video in which you can experience a trek to the top of Mt. Everest in 3-d, and get a panoramic view from the top:

Don Henderson says we live in a truly beautiful world, and sends this link to prove it:

Tom Telfer forwards the URL for a video ofthe Swiss pilot Yves Rossy, the "man-jet," completing a fabulous flight over Rio de Janeiro. This pioneer in the air wears clothes with wings and flies to 1,200 meters high. He is the only man to fly with a rigid wing equipped with four jet engines:

Tom Williamson suggests this site for the story of a massive salvage operation that lifted the MV Baltic Ace from the sea bed in the North Sea:

To sign a petition asking the Canadian government to close tax loopholes for the wealthy, click on

Here is a passionate letter of apology to future generations:

For one of natures wonders, Flamingo Lake, click on

Three classical artists have fun playing a spirited rendition of Live and Let Die:

In this video we see how a Dutch-Ghanaian company is turning garbage in Ghana into profits. The collecting, sorting, assembling and transportation of all the plastic waste employs about 500 people before the recycling even begins:

To check out the features of the "freedictionary", which changes daily, go to