Home  >> Stories  >> The Tale Spinner #2016-14

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IN THIS ISSUE

VOL. XXII, NO. 14, APRIL 2, 2016

IN THIS ISSUE

• Kate Brookfield resumes her account of their spring holiday
• Kate comments on the story about Charlie Parkhurst
• Catherine Nesbitt forwards a story about a silent convent
• Eve Cassidy writes about protecting oneself online
• Are computers male or female?
• Tony Lewis thinks seniors need abbreviations for texting
• Sites are suggested by Barbara Wear, Carol Dilworth, Tom Telfer, and Tom Williamson

Kate has been sending regular updates from their

SPRING HOLIDAY, 2016

March 27: The flight to Punta Cana in the Dominican Republic was uneventful, except West Jet flights are so intrusive. They keep interrupting with messages, and think they have to make silly jokes. They now have WIFI on board, so travellers must download the West Jet app and get their entertainment on their own personal devices. I also noted that it was mainly men serving the trolley, and one female attendant collecting the garbage!

The flight was four hours (three hours and 55 minutes, as they kept telling us.)

So now I am writing this waiting for dinner. I had a dip in the ocean already, but it was windy, so it was hard to swim. I hope it will be calmer tomorrow.

Our accommodation is basic: one room and a private bathroom, and sharing the lounge and kitchen with two other couples.

Showers when travelling: Am I the only adult on this planet who has to be helped getting a shower to work? My optician tells me I have 20-20 vision with my glasses on, but not that I am probably legally blind without my specs.

Through experience, I know to check out the shower before taking off my glasses, but have not yet learned to do this before taking off my clothes. Luckily, Michael is usually around and he can always figure it out - twist and pull out, or push in and twist, or a hundred other combinations.

Last night, because of my swim in the sea, l had sand everywhere. I was raised by the sea, but we never had showers on the beach. In all my years of travelling the globe, I have never got into the habit of showering at the beach. From now on....

March 29: Yesterday we walked to the supermarket along the beach. We are allowed to walk as far as we can, as long as we do not try to leave the beach to go to the road. The whole beach area is a seamless string of expensive resorts. The beach in front of the resort is patrolled by security guards who prevent people like us from walking through the resort to the road.

Every so often there are some beach shops with access in and out through the stalls. I stopped at one and thought I would get a hat cheaper than at the fancy shopping mall. I chose a wide brimmed hat made in China and a long scarf I wanted to wear as a belt. The shopkeeper showed the price in pesos on his calculator, so I divided the sum by 43 and it came to $63.00, and that was the U.S. rate! On our return he shouted at me to give me "real" price. I told him he´d lost his chances with me!

We leave here early tomorrow morning. There will be a three-and-a-half-hour bus ride to Santa Domingo. We are told it is air conditioned and to bring a warm rug as it might be too cold on the bus. We board the cruise ship about 2:00 p.m.

I´m not sure about internet connection on the voyage. These cruise ships usually charge a lot for WIFI, so my next post might be April 11th in Gibraltar. I am sure you can wait!

No more e-mails for a while.

ED. NOTE: To check out Kate´s messages and photos, click on http://wp.me/p7neuK-m

CORRESPONDENCE

Kate comments on the story of a stage coach driver in the old west in the last issue: I take it the correct name IS Parkhurst? Quite a few Pankhursts in the story got me wondering which it was. Very interesting story!

ED. NOTE: Perhaps Kate is confusing Charlie Pankhurst with Emmeline Pankhurst, the British suffragette who campaigned for the right for women to vote, and in 2007 was listed among the 100 British women who changed the world.

Catherine Nesbitt sends the following story about

THE SILENT CONVENT

The abbess said, "Sister, this is a silent convent. You are welcome here as long as you like but you may not speak until directed to do so."

Sister Mary Katherine lived in the convent for five years before the abbess said to her, "Sister Mary Katherine, you have been here for five years. You may speak two words."

Sister Mary Katherine said, "Hard bed."

"I´m sorry to hear that," the abbess said. "We will get you a better bed."

After another five years, Sister Mary Katherine was summoned by the abbess. "You may say another two words, Sister Mary Katherine."

"Cold food," said Sister Mary Katherine, and the abbess assured her that the food would be better in the future.

On her 15th anniversary at the convent, the abbess again called Sister Mary Katherine into her office. "You may say two words today."

"I quit," said Sister Mary Katherine.

"It´s probably best," said the abbess. "You´ve done nothing but bitch since you got here."

Eve Cassidy writes a column for the ARP Webbers Newsletter, a UK letter for seniors:

PROTECT YOURSELF ONLINE

In this newsletter I would like to mention large social media sites such as Facebook, Twitter, etc. Personally, I have not used them, though I believe some of our readers may enjoy doing so.

I would like to bring to your attention some sensible tips I read about entitled social media posts that are a gift to criminals. I am sure most of you are quite careful with what you post on these sites, but you might like to be reminded of some of the dangers that may inadvertently occur whilst posting. For example:

1. Real-time photographs from your holiday - you´re telling the burglars your house is empty.

2. Similarly, using Facebooks checking-in feature when you´re at the airport, accompanied by a photo of you with you pre-flight glass of wine.

3. Photos of your car and house.

4. The school you attended and the dates your were there - just what criminals need to compile a dossier of your personal details.

5. Birthdays and Anniversaries.

6. Your phone number and e-mail address.

7. Pets and children/grandchildren´s names - often used in security questions.

The trouble is that on the whole, we "oldies" come from a much more trusting generation, and find it harder to live in the present electronic communications age where we have "to watch our backs" at all times.

FARCING

People on Facebook can create "farce accounts," pretending to be a friend of a friend, and once in your circle of trust, they gather information to scam you and gain access to your online accounts, depending on how you have your profile set up.

Be wary of friend requests from vague acquaintances and don´t post information that would be useful to an identity thief.

THE E-MAILED RECEIPT

One of the present nuisances which keep popping up in my e-mails lately are the bogus e-mailed receipt. These will "Thank me for my order," and encourage me to click below to print the receipt out for my records. I usually don´t recognise anything to suggest that I may have bought from them, and their e-mail address has some strange foreign last few letters.

If you click on the supposed receipt, this usually sends a "back door Trojan" to your computer which can monitor your keystrokes, when you are asked to fill in any further details. This was reported by David Emm, a security researcher at Kaspersky Lab.

BOGUS ELECTRICAL GOODS AND APPLIANCES

Fraudsters are setting up high specification websites advertising various electrical goods and domestic appliances. These goods are below market value and do not exist. The website will state you can pay via credit card. However, when the purchaser goes to pay, this option is not available and the payment must be made via bank transfer.

The fraudster entices the purchaser and reassures them it is a legitimate purchase by using the widely recognised Trusted Shop Trustmark. They then use the Trustmark fraudulently and provide a link on the bogus electrical website to another bogus website (which purports to be Trusted Shops.) This website shows a fake certificate purporting to be from Trusted Shops, and provides thousands of reviews for the bogus electrical website. These reviews are all fraudulent. The website has not been certified by Trusted Shops, and therefore the purchaser is not covered by the Trusted Shop money-back guarantee.

PROTECT YOURSELF

Check the authenticity of the website before making any purchases. Conduct a "Whois" search on the website which will identify when the website was created. Be wary of newly-formed domains. You can conduct this search using the following website - https://who.is/

Conduct online research in relation to the website, company name, and the business address provided to identify any poor feedback or possible irregularities. Check the Trusted Shops Facebook page, where warnings about websites using their Trustmark are published. If you are in doubt about the legitimacy of a Trustmark, then you can contact Trusted Shops by e-mail at service@trustedshops.co.uk. They will confirm whether they have certified that website.

Always try to make the payment via PayPal or a credit card where you have some payment cover should you not receive your product.

If the item advertised seems too good to be true, then it probably is.

ED. NOTE: This article is published with permission from the ARP Webbers Newsletter, an Internet and Computing Newsletter. if you are interested in reading the present or archived copies, you will find them at http://www.fcfed.com under Members Interest Groups.

THE COMPUTER IS GENDER CONFUSED

A language teacher was explaining to her class that in French, nouns, unlike their English counterparts, are grammatically designated as masculine or feminine.

´"House" in French, is feminine - "la maison," while "pencil" in French is masculine - "le crayon."´

One puzzled student asked, "What gender is a computer?"

The teacher thought it would be a good exercise to have the students decide what they thought the gender should be.

So she split the class into two groups, appropriately enough, by gender, and asked them to decide whether "computer" should be a masculine or a feminine noun. Both groups were required to give four reasons for their recommendation.

The men´s group decided that computer should definitely be of the feminine gender ("la computer"), because:

1. No-one but their creator understands their internal logic.

2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.

3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for possible later review.

4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you constantly find yourself spending more money on accessories for it.

The women´s group, however, concluded that computers should be masculine ("le computer") because:

1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on.

2. They have a lot of data but still can´t think for themselves.

3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem.

4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer you could have gotten a better model!

Tony Lewis forwards these helpful codes:

*GGLKI

I thought you might need help with texting your friends. After all, the kids have all their little codes, like BFF, WTF, etc. So here are the codes for those of you now in your senior years:

ATD - At the Doctor´s

BFF - Best Friend´s Funeral

BTW - Bring the Wheelchair

BYOT - Bring Your Own Teeth

CBM - Covered by Medicare

CUATSC - See You at the Senior Center

DWI - Driving While Incontinent

FWBB - Friend with Beta Blockers

FWIW - Forgot Where I Was

FYI - Found Your Insulin

GGPBL - Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low

GHA - Got Heartburn Again

HGBM - Had Good Bowel Movement

IMHO - Is My Hearing-Aid On?

LMDO - Laughing My Dentures Out

LOL - Living on Lipitor

LWO - Lawrence Welk´s On

OMMR - On My Massage Recliner

OMSG - Oh My! Sorry, Gas

ROFL - CGU - Rolling on the Floor Laughing - Can´t Get Up!

TTYL - Talk to You Louder

WAITT - Who Am I Talking To?

WTFA - Wet the Furniture Again

WTP - Where´s the Prunes?

WWNO - Walker Wheels Need Oil

*GGLKI - Gotta Go, Laxative Kicking in!

Hope these help.

SUGGESTED WEBSITES

Barbara Wear forwards this link to a video showing kids reacting to typewriters, which to them must seem to belong to the age of dinosaurs:

Carol Dilworth sends the URL for the Cornell Lab of Ornithology, which explores the diversity and evolution of 243 bird families over 375 million years. Great for birdwatchers, and interesting to everyone:

Tom Telfer suggests this video of four amazing young acrobats performing unbelievable feats:

Tom Williamson forwards this link to an edition of Shift Happens, which shows in graphic detail how quickly the world in changing:

Tom also sends the URL for a Snopes´ report on home-made bombs in plastic bottles which can have disastrous effects on unsuspecting people:

For "the happiest video ever," showing an animal sanctuary in Australia, click on

From the GoodNewsNetwork, watch this fascinating man who grows citrus fruits even in snow with his geothermal greenhouse:

Poverty and gender inequality go hand-in-hand. In too many countries, being born poor and female means a life sentence of oppression and poverty - and in many cases it´s also a death sentence. Add your name to the global letter calling on world leaders to recognize that gender inequality is a global issue. Those hit hardest by it - women and girls in developing countries - must be heard:

In this TED talk, Latif Nasser explains why we have no idea where camels really come from:

This "bad dog" that was destined to spend its life in a shelter catches 150 poachers in two years:

To check out the features of the "freedictionary", which changes daily, go to