Home  >> Stories  >> The Tale Spinner #2016-29

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IN THIS ISSUE

• Mike Yeager writes about a memorable ride
• Barbara Wear and Betty Audet send a story about a senior problem
• Bruce Galway forwards a story about rules in a seniors´ complex
• Tony Lewis sends a challenging quiz
• Tom Telfer found some unusual word definitions
• Tom Williamson shares Charles Schultz´ philosophy
• Irene Harvalias tries to relearn an old skill
• Sites are suggested by Barbara Wear and Judy Lee

Mike Yeager describes

THE LAST WILD RIDE

Don was not supposed to be driving. He has dementia. His wife told me before we left the house, He is not to drive, and she knows what she´s talking about. So Don and I took off in their Subaru Forrester with me behind the wheel and headed up to Louella´s Cabin. It´s about fifteen miles from our home in Sequim, a beautiful drive up into the foothills of the Olympic Mountains.

Louella was Don´s grandmother. She and her husband built the cabin in the early 1900s, when the Peninsula was sparsely populated. It is now owned and run by the Park Service and can be rented. I had been to the cabin with Don once before, before he had dementia. He and I had walked around the cabin and looked in the windows. Don was excited to point out the pictures hanging inside on the cabin walls. They were pictures of his relatives. I really couldn´t see them clearly, but Don told me who was pictured in each one. We talked with several of the neighbors.

They were excited to meet the grandson of Louella. Everyone in the area knows a little about Louella, or at least they know her name. At the intersection of Louella Road and the gravel road leading up to the cabin, a Park Service sign identifies it as Louella´s Cabin.

On the drive home in my car on that first trip, Don made sure I took the narrow asphalt road that angled off the main road leading down the mountain and ending at Highway 101. He told me that when his grandparents lived in the cabin, the road was dirt and/or mud, and Louella would harness the mule with a rope, throw saddlebags over his back, and walk the five or so miles down to the Blyn store to get supplies.

When we reached the cabin, I parked the Subaru in front and Don and I walked into the woods behind it. He told me he had roamed these woods often as child. As we walked, Don whistled. He is an avid whistler. He doesn´t whistle complete songs, only pieces. Once on a walk, I asked him what he was whistling and he said he didn´t know. I was able to identify a few of the songs, but Don really wasnt that interested in knowing what they were. He became a little disoriented a few times as we traipsed through the woods, but clearly he enjoyed being in the familiar territory of his childhood.

When we returned to the car, I opened the driver´s door and started to get in when Don called out, "I´d like to drive."

I hesitated, but there was something in his look that caused me to toss him the keys. He caught them one handed. He drove slowly and carefully down the driveway and out onto Louella Road, but as soon as he turned down the narrow asphalt road leading to Blyn, he sped up. The road is windy and my body was thrown from side to side. "Don, don´t you think you should slow down?"

He looked at me with fire in his eyes and continued barreling down the mountain. What have I done? Don´s wife told me not to let him drive and now we´re both going to be killed in a fiery crash.

"Don, you need to slow down!" I yelled, but instead of slowing down, he accelerated. My good friend with dementia seemed to be channeling Mario Andretti. He flung the car around a sharp turn and onto a dirt road. We were heading straight for the cliff edge overlooking the river. I braced myself for a Thelma and Louise ending, but suddenly Don rotated the steering wheel, putting the car into a sideways skid, and we came to rest at the edge of the steep embankment. Don looked at me and smiled with open, clear eyes. He was completely focused and aware of what he was doing and never looked more alive. I realized he must have driven these roads hundreds of times. I relaxed after that and let Don skillfully maneuver the car down to the highway.

My relaxed attitude quickly dissipated when we got to the busy intersection. Don was having trouble deciding when to pull out into the traffic. He began inching his way out as cars whizzed by. I realized his disorientation was back and he needed my help.

"Don, pull over. I can take it from here." He looked at me, his focus and clarity gone, replaced by uncertainty and confusion. He got out of the car and walked around to the passenger´s side, and I drove home.

Don now lives in an assisted living facility. We are going to visit him next week. I bet he´s made lots of friends in his new home and I hope he´s still whistling. I´ll never forget going with him on his last wild ride.

ED. NOTE: For photos of Louella´s cabin, click on http://aretiredboomer.blogspot.ca/

Barbara Wear and Betty Audet forward this story:

THIS HAPPENED IN AN ASSISTED LIVING CENTRE

The people who live there have small apartments but they all eat at a central cafeteria. One morning one of the residents didn´t show up for breakfast, so my wife went upstairs and knocked on his door to see if everything was OK. She could hear him through the door, and he said that he was running late and would be down shortly, so she went back to the dining area.

An hour later he still hadn´t arrived, so she went back up towards his room and she found him on the stairs. He was coming down the stairs but was having a hell of time. He had a death grip on the hand rail and seemed to have trouble getting his legs to work right. She told him she was going to call an ambulance, but he told her no, he wasn´t in any pain and just wanted to have his breakfast. So she helped him the rest of the way down the stairs and he had his breakfast.

When he tried to return to his room he was completely unable to get up even the first step, so they called an ambulance for him. A couple hours later she called the hospital to see how he was doing. The receptionist there said he was fine - he just had both of his legs in one leg of his boxer shorts.

ED. NOTE: This story is from Wendy Fisher´s site for seniors:

http://www.retirement-online.com/senior-fun.html

Speaking of assisted living centres, Bruce Galway forwards this tale:

THE NEW SENIORS´ COMPLEX

On the opening day at a new seniors´ complex, the manager addressed all the new residents, pointing out some of the rules:

"The female sleeping quarters will be out-of-bounds for all males, and the male quarters to the females.

"Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time." He continued, "Anybody caught breaking this rule the second time will be fined $60.

"Being caught a third time will cost you a fine of $180.

"Are there any questions?"

An older gentleman named Tom stood up in the crowd and inquired, "How much for a season pass?"

Tony Lewis sends this

TO ALL MY INTELLIGENT FRIENDS

See if you can figure out what these seven words all have in common:

1. Banana
2. Dresser
3. Grammar
4. Potato
5. Revive
6. Uneven
7. Assess

Look at each word carefully. You´ll kick yourself when you discover the answer. No, it is not that they all have at least two double letters. The answer is:

In all of the words listed, if you take the first letter, place it at the end of the word, and then spell the word backwards, it will be the same word.

Did you figure it out?

No? Then send this to more people and stump them as well. Then you´ll feel better too!

Tom Telfer shares these

WONDERFUL WORD DEFINITIONS

Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die rich.

Nurse: A person who wakes you up to give you sleeping pills.

Marriage: It´s an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.

Divorce: Future tense of marriage.

Father: A banker provided by nature.

Criminal: A person no different from the rest … except that he/she got caught.

Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.

Classic: Books which people praise but do not read.

Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouths.

Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do, but in reality it means End of Thinking Capacity.

Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.

Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.

Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life to be wise.

Tom Williamson shares

CHARLES SCHULZ´ PHILOSOPHY

The following is the philosophy of Charles Schulz, the creator of the "Peanuts" comic strip.

You don´t have to actually answer the questions; just think about them. Read the e-mail straight through and you´ll get the point.

1. Name the five wealthiest people in theworld.
2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.
3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America pageant.
4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer Prize.
5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for best actor and actress.
6. Name the last decade´s worth of World Series winners.

How did you do?

The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday. These are no second-rate achievers; they are the best in their fields. But the applause dies ... awards tarnish ... achievements are forgotten ... accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.

Here´s another quiz. See how you do on this one:

1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.
2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.
3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.
4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.
5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.

Easier?

The lesson: The people who make a difference in your life are not the ones with the most credentials, the most money, or the most awards. They simply are the ones who care the most.

Irene Harvalias forwards this:

A GLASS OF RED WINE

My doctor recently suggested that I take up the hula hoop for a good type of cardio exercise.

She also advised me that it was not as easy now as it was when I was 15. I quickly informed her that I could not hula hoop even when I was 15.

So the next day I went to WalMart and bought a hoop.

It´s true, I STILL can´t master the darned thing, try as I might.

Then, lo and behold, this video was sent to me today. I now have a purpose for honing my hula hoop skills (although I don´t think this is exactly what she had in mind!) However, I do have the wine part down perfectly!

I´ll keep you posted on my progress.

Click here: http://tinyurl.com/a2y3yo4

SUGGESTED WEBSITES

Barbara Wear sends this link to a video of a man carving a tree stump with a rotary saw as an alternative to stump removal:

Judy Lee shares the URL for a video of China´s graceful ice skating duo at the 2016 Boston Figure Skating Championships:

Bill Nye unravels the mysteries of solar-powered space travel. See how NASA´s Juno spacecraft used the power of the sun to keep the juice running during its long journey to and orbits of Jupiter:

Chris "Brogla" Barns, star of the BBC´s "Kangaroo Dundee," has set up a sanctuary for orphaned baby kangaroos in Alice Springs, Australia, and is also building central Australia´s first wildlife hospital:

A recent Consumer Reports survey found that 27 percent of people have trouble falling asleep or staying asleep most nights. This site suggests ways to fall asleep:

Here are the National Geographic photograph winners for 2016:

This site gives a summary of some of the great scientific discoveries made in 2015:

In this TED talk, Dr. Leana Wen talks about what your doctor won´t disclose - whether he is a paid spokesman for a drug company, or has personal beliefs incompatible with the treatment you want, or other subjects:

To check out the features of the "freedictionary," which changes daily, go to