Home  >> Stories  >> The Tale Spinner #2018-05

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IN THIS ISSUE

• Lynn Maynard tells of a simple gift that makes a lot of difference
• Carol Dilworth writes about book recommendations
• Shirley Conlon forwards the seniors´ calendar for February
• Here is a favourite poem, "Warning" by Jenny Joseph
• Irene Harvalias shares these simple household remedies
• Gerrit de Leeuw sends an example of the power of the human mind
• Mike Dunn posts a story about what women really want
• Catherine Nesbitt forwards this geography lesson
• Sites are suggested by Barbara Wear, Irene Harvalias, Tom Telfer, and Tom Williamson

Lynn Maynard of Arizona sent this story to Heroic Stories:

THE BETTER GIFT

On Thursday, November 19, 2009, I took a six-hour embroidery class. When the class ended at 3:30 p.m., I drove my car to a nearby fast food drive through. I then returned to the sewing shop for my next class, which would last four hours. I parked in front of the store and ate my meal.

It was a nice day, with temperatures in the mid 70s, although our fall Phoenix nights the temperature falls to the low 40s.

As I ate, I noticed a man sitting on the curb. He was about six foot tall, with a thin build, weathered face, and a couple days beard growth. He reached into a backpack, pulled out a razor, and began to shave.

When finished, he proceeded to change his holey gross-looking socks, which were caked with dried blood, and replaced them with a new pair. He seems to have pride in taking care of himself, I thought.

When I buy something at the drive through, I throw my change in the pocket of the driver´s side door. Watching this man, I decided to hand him what was there: four bucks.

As I approached him he said, "You have a nice car."

"I´m still paying for it," I said. "Here´s a few dollars. When you´re finished maybe you can get something at the drive-in nearby. They have a nice selection on their dollar menu and you can get refills."

He thanked me, saying, "God Bless you."

I then went back in for my next class. My class finished at 7:00 p.m. and I loaded all my equipment into the back of my car. After 10 hours of classes I was tired.

Then I saw it. What is that note? I thought. Don´t tell me someone scratched my car!

I got in the car and turned on the light to read the note. To my surprise, there was a note thanking me for the $4.00. Dan told me that he is doing all right, but many homeless people need socks, so maybe I could carry a few pairs in my car. He said that he gets gift cards for $10.00 and socks at the nearby church. In his note Dan said, "If you want to, you could donate socks to the church, then the homeless men would be very grateful."

WOW!

It was only four bucks. Dan´s thank you gave me the better gift - of feeling that I can make a difference, with socks!

Dan taught me even when you are homeless you can make someone´s life better. Now I want to do more for our homeless friends in need. Thank you, Dan. Socks are on the way!

ED. NOTE: E-mail subscriptions to HeroicStories are free. Sign up here: HeroicStories.org.

CORRESPONDENCE

Carol Dilworth writes: I can´t remember if I sent you the book recommendations some years back, but the newsletter recommends The Bookshop.

Also, a recent comment I heard about aging: "If I work until I´m 94, I can afford to retire at 87."

ED. NOTE: Is The Bookshop a franchise, or is there only one of them? There does not seem to be as many book stores as there used to be, especially used book stores. Thank goodness for libraries!

Shirley Conlon forwards another calendar created by residents of a senior care home in Germany. Here is the picture for February:

FEBRUARY

Breakfast at Tiffany´s Marianne Brunsbach, 86

This month has seen the passing of three beloved authors, all after long and full lives: Peter Mayle, aged 78, Ursula K Le Guin at 88, and poet Jenny Joseph at 85.

Joseph´s poem "Warning" was twice voted Britain´s favorite poem. It is perhaps best known for its opening lines: "When I am an old woman I shall wear purple / With a red hat that doesn´t go, and doesn´t suit me."

Despite it being about old age, Joseph was in her 20s when she wrote it - and never did like purple - it didn´t suit her!

WARNING

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired,
And gobble up samples in shops, and press alarm bells,

And run my stick along the public railings,
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick the flowers in other people's gardens,
And learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat,
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go.
Or only bread and pickle for a week.
And hoard pens and pencils and beer mats and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry,
And pay our rent and not swear in the street,
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practise a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

Irene Harvalias shares these

AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

1. To avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables, get someone else to hold the vegetables while you chop.

2. To avoid arguments with females about lowering the toilet seat, use the sink.

3. For high blood pressure sufferers - simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure on your veins. Remember to use a timer!

4. A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

5. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives - you´ll be afraid to cough.

6. You need only two tools in life: WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn´t move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn´t move and does, use the duct tape.

7. If you can´t fix it with a hammer, you´ve got an electrical problem.

Gerrit de Leeuw wonders how we ever learned to spell in the first place:

THE PAOMNNEHIL PEOWR OF THE HMUAN MNID

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn´t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?

Mike Dunn posted this story:

WHAT DO WOMEN REALLY WANT?

Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighbouring Celtic kingdom. The monarch could have killed him, but was moved by Arthur´s youthful happiness. So he offered him freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer; if, after a year, he still had no answer, he would be put to death. The question was: "What do women really want?"

Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, and to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. But since it was better than death, he accepted the monarch´s proposition to have an answer by the year´s end.

He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everybody: the princesses, the prostitutes, the priests, the wise men, and the court jester. In all, he spoke with everyone, but no one could give him a satisfactory answer. What most people did tell him was to consult the old witch, as only she would know the answer.

The price would be high, since the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.

The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no alternative but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer his question, but he´d have to accept her price first. The old witch wanted to marry Gawain, the most noble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur´s closest friend! Young Arthur was horrified: she was hunchbacked and awfully hideous, had only one tooth, smelled like sewage water, often made obscene noises, and had discoloured skin. He had never run across such a repugnant creature. He refused to force his friend to marry her and have to endure such a burden.

However, Gawain, upon learning of the proposal, spoke with Arthur. He told him that nothing was too big a sacrifice in order to save Arthur´s life and preserve the Round Table. Hence, their wedding was proclaimed, and the witch answered Arthur´s question: "What a woman really wants is to be able to be in charge of her own life."

Everyone instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth and that Arthur´s life would be spared. And so it went. The neighbouring monarch spared Arthur´s life and granted him total freedom.

What a wedding Gawain and the witch had! Arthur was torn between relief and anguish. Gawain was proper as always, gentle and courteous. The old witch put her worst manners on display and generally made everyone very uncomfortable.

The wedding night approached: Gawain, steeling himself for a horrific night, entered the bedroom. What a sight awaited! The most beautiful woman he´d ever seen lay before him! Gawain was astounded and asked what had happened. The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her (when she´d been a witch), half the time she would be her horrible, deformed self and the other half, she would be her beautiful maiden self. Which would he want her to be during the day and which during the night?

What a cruel question! Gawain began to think of his predicament. During the day a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of his home, an old spooky witch? Or would he prefer having by day a hideous witch, but by night a beautiful woman to enjoy many intimate moments?

Noble Gawain replied that he would let her choose for herself. Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time because he had respected her and had let her be in charge of her own life.

What is the moral of this story?

The moral is that it doesn´t matter if your woman is pretty or ugly. Underneath it all, she´s still a witch and don´t you forget it.

Catherine Nesbitt forwards this analogy:

THE GEOGRAPHY OF WOMEN AND MEN

Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa: Half discovered, half wild, fertile, and naturally beautiful!

Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe: Well developed and open to trade, especially for someone of real value.

Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain: Very hot, relaxed, and convinced of her own beauty.

Between 36 and 40, a woman is like Greece: Gently aging but still a warm and desirable place to visit.

Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain: With a glorious and all-conquering past.

Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Israel: Has been through war, doesn´t make the same mistakes twice, and takes care of business.

Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada: Self-preserving, but open to meeting new people.

After 70, she becomes Tibet: Wildly beautiful, with a mysterious past, and the wisdom of the ages; an adventurous spirit and a thirst for spiritual knowledge.

THE GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN

Between one and 100, a man is like North Korea and the United States: Ruled by a pair of nuts.

ED. NOTE: Hmmm. I don´t remember being like that.... Can my memory be that bad? ;)

SUGGESTED SITES

Barbara Wear forwards this link to a video of repair men working on the statue of Christ The Redeemer in Rio de Janeiro:

Irene Harvalias reminds us of this Scottish video in which a woman changes the message on a blind man´s sign to one that reminds passers-by how lucky they are:

Tom Telfer sends the URL for a compilation of some of the best skiing videos, mostly without the use of snow:

Tom Williamson forwards this link to a BBC video about China´s camera surveillance network of 170 million cameras, many of which include facial recognition technology:

This site says that new research will radically change doctors´ response to strokes, saving many lives in the process:

Deforestation is one of the greatest challenges facing humanity. BioCarbon Engineering, a UK-based company, has come up with a method of planting trees quickly and cheaply. A drone can plant up to 100,000 trees a day, especially in areas that are difficult to access or are otherwise unviable:

Here are 19 tips on how to make your dog as happy as can be: